Monthly Archives: March 2014

Willpower: A Keystone Habit

Business, Job Search, Problem Solving, , , , ,

In Charles Duhigg’s book, The Power of Habit, he writes about the way willpower, or discipline, is a keystone habit. Once it becomes a habit it tends to affect everything else.

interview-questionsI’ve noticed this during the volunteer coaching that I do at the Career Transitions Center of Chicago. Those who tend to do well are the ones who have the discipline, or willpower, to put forth the effort that is needed to develop:

  • A value statement.
  • Write, edit and memorize ten stories.
  • Develop a networking plan and stick to it.
  • Script and memorize answers to the top 20 questions.
  • Conduct mock interviews to isolate potentially negative or distracting behaviors.

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This takes a lot of work, and many are not up to the task. But those who are find success much faster than those who are not.

Smiling Group of Professionals --- Image by © Royalty-Free/CorbisWhat is a person with poor discipline and inadequate willpower to do? Become a part of a group. Think about some of the most obvious areas where willpower is required, areas like dieting. How do people acquire the willpower to maintain a diet? They join groups like WeightWatchers. And these groups provide many benefits that nurture the development of willpower.

First, they make the achievement seem attainable. As you look around the group you might think, “If he can do it, so can I.”

Second, they reinforce the good behaviors by praising your gains or losses (of weight).

Third, a community offers its own reinforcement. You no longer feel isolated and alone in your struggle.

So, if you are not a particularly disciplined person, then consider becoming a part of a group of people who are pursuing a similar goal. Then, meeting by meeting, you will find yourself moving closer to developing the keystone habit of willpower, a habit that affects everything.

Consulting Assignment in Europe and Leveraging Your Strengths

Business, Coaching, , , ,

I will be traveling to Germany soon to work with a group of sales professionals from Germany, France, Italy, and Belgium. It will be my second time with this group and the focus will be the adoption of successful behaviors. One of these behaviors that works in sales, leadership, job interviews and life, is creating and telling powerful stories.

Strengths-ImageI’ve already received several of this class’s stories and they will become part of a series of workshops, but one was particularly powerful. It was written in English (for my sake), and English is not this person’s native tongue. What amazed me was the way I did not have to make many changes to this story to improve it.

I’ve given dozens of story-telling courses, and some have involved people with advanced degrees from Stanford and other fine schools, but one variable remains constant: I must rewrite their story to make it better. But not this European’s story.

How could this be? Another part of this consulting course provided the answer. The course will include, among other things, a few workshops on discovering your strengths and then leveraging them in your work. According to StrengthsFinders, this person possesses the strength of communication which, their literature states, is an innate gift for turning events into vivid, powerful stories (among other things). The question becomes, “Did this person know about this strength and leverage it prior to this training?”

The first time I met this group was in Rome, and I do not remember this individual mentioning the use of stories in his or her work. More than likely, it is a great strength that has been under-utilized. Hopefully, following this assignment, they will all learn about their strengths and begin to employ them with intentionality. And if they do, they will be more engaged and successful in their work.

Job Search and the Meaning of Life

Christianity, , , , , , ,

shutterstock_142745281I realize the title is pompous sounding, but take a deep breath and think of some of your friends who have gone through an agonizing job search. Or perhaps it was you. I’m talking about the job-search campaign that lasts many months, or years, and takes you through over a dozen interviews, painstakingly prepared for, several of which had you among the finalists in the second or third round. And then after each one, silence, or the corporate “Dear John” letter that announces they just found a better catch and you are being ditched.

This soul-numbing process intersects with the “meaning of life” when we reach that Alfie-like moment and wonder, “What’s it all about?” I’ve heard it expressed by several clients who I’ve met at the Career Transitions Center of Chicago, and others who were referred to me by friends.

One of these referrals is an attractive, smart, strategic-thinking woman who has gone through the high-hopes-and-dashed-hopes hell of job search. I’ve met with her twice and this second time she said, “You know what. I am just tired. Tired of it all.” Her angry, frustrated tone said it all. And then she added, “Every one keeps telling me how skilled and gifted I am. If that’s true, then why am I not working?”

Why indeed? And why is the duration of this trial so long, so exhausting? If there is a God–and I believe there is–then what is God trying to accomplish by this? Teach us humility when we can’t sink any lower? Have us turn toward Him when this miserable time of our life is making us so angry we are turning away from Him?

It was largely for this reason that I wrote A Guide to God’s Perplexing Path. God tells us, in Scripture, that His ways and thoughts are so much higher than ours that we cannot understand them. This spiritual fact–that His Path is inscrutably higher than our own–makes His Path and, therefore, our life, perplexing. So how will we ever make sense of it? What’s it all about?

Fortunately, He left us markers delineating the Way we are to walk, and these markers reveal why His Path is so perplexing. The short answer: It is designed to be.

A Guide frontcover 1-13-14 BThe Guide shows there is a purpose to this seemingly endless misery we sometimes suffer. You needn’t buy the book, because the first three chapters are posted on my website for free, and they will help you understand what this maddening, frustrating, and sometimes excruciating journey is trying to accomplish. (That said, the eBook version is only $.99 on Amazon.) Here is a link to those chapters. I hope they bring you peace if you are anxious, hope if you are depressed, and relief from the discomfort of this unsettling experience.  http://bit.ly/1lz4g4e